Dandelions in the wind.....

I admit...I am so preoccupied by the present that my mind flees like a monkey.From thought to thought it jumps with the agility of a mountain goat.It does not mean that the past doesn't get hold of me.It does at times...when the mind is lulled by a seeking serenity,it decides to take a dip in the overclouding thoughtful deluge.I wish at times if i could have Dumbledore's pensieve. A large container in which you can store your memories.No..not just store, it should also serve me like how it served the master of Hogwarts.I should be able to see myself in it; a me .. a long time ago. Pick out on a particular memory and fly on the wings of remembrance.It would be simply an out of the world experience to delve into those years and live again in the folds of a lovely memory.

Well...my mind has just proved its mettle. I was trying to admit that i had neglected my blog for a certain considerate period of time albeit the ubiquitous truth that i have been jobless for the past 5 months. I can certainly give vainglorious reasons of accustoming to a new city,people and life and as vain the reasons are I'm still in search of an answer . An answer as to why i did not resort to the cathartic rejuvenation of my soul by penning out my thoughts. As i did admit earlier...

'yes...',my mind is completely immersed in the chaotic sea of present.. that my blog of the past took some time to crawl its way into my head. Life over the past months has been a hotch-potch of miscellaneous activities; joyous..pleasant..bland..unpleasant and sad. People ask me how i find my new life and the new city... I tell them i am happy. I would have had a myriad of occasions to fatten my bank balance if id stayed back and a consolation that I am closer to home. But i chose to get away. Away from a lot of prying ,pretense swabbed eyes of many they call society. I also got away(read not exactly) from being closer in proximity to a mother whose soul ambition in life, if i recall.. was to get me married off. Yes,that's true..i really believe my mother's very purpose of existence was to bring me up so that one day i can be a blushing garlanded bride ready to accept marriage vows and litter the human race with combined inputs. So..i just ran away from a whole life of somebody's dreams. Now the dreams have acquired crinkled edges and they are mouldy like an old once-lovely photograph. Yet here i am ..quite contented and happy.

Well...here it went again..the good old monkey...fleeting thoughts its prerogative. So..without much ado let me promise to myself that i shall begin to pen my thoughts more often. Let the oxymoron run his charades in my totally oxymoronic world. Do you know something...? One of the earliest memories of mine is me wishing to be locked up in the school library so that i could read throughout the night. Though the thought process eventually included a then-crush as i entered my teens ,the arena of the lock up never varied. It was still a romantic tryst in the middle of books. "Ooh so corny now"..But then, it was a fodder for a lot many dreams of starry love. The mother part was on the rampage even then by flicking my books and hiding them away behind motherly places (the cupboards,kitchen shelves,under the gas stove). The reason alluded to my staying up long into the night reading ,even after the lights were switched off and on an accusation of relative gravity ,that i hid books inside large text books when pledging allegiance to studies. I recall ..One night just as i was barely breathing ,gripped by the adventure that was enfolding before my eyes ..translating in my mind ...my books were lost in the sudden coup d'etat and curfew was declared by mommy General. Into the night,i was badly badgered by the thought of the five falling into the enemies trap..that i sought the help of a lonely firefly which had wandered its way into my room...Would you believe it...? I actually managed to read a few pages in the incandescence the glow worm spared.

Ohh..There it jumped again...From stone to stone...The mind of mine...But here i am..After covering many a milestone...Quite changed..A lot different from that little girl who read with fireflies..Nevertheless...I still do have this disposition of a child's wherein my mind fleets from thought to thought. Owing to this...many a  grievance i have heard ..Many a remark. But i guess i am happy this way... To sojourn with a sorrow or happiness ...Not to be entirely depressed or gloat over a situation...I shall let them all pass...Skip from thought to thought until i find myself happy...I wait for a cool breeze to blow my thoughts into the air..And let them hover there....Like dandelions in the wind...For i have set my sails and I'm waiting for the wind to take me wherever it goes....